The Circle of Life              6 -7-1998
By Dale G. Cox

You get a circle by taking a line and orienting it to the degree that it turns back around and meets itself. Life happens much the same way, only sometimes we don't remember the beginnings or the ends. We have heard comments like "what goes around comes around", and "you get what you deserve." But how exactly does that work. Contrary to popular disbelief, there are some dynamic laws that define not only the nature of matter in the universe, but also the nature of spirit. You are Spirit inhabiting matter. These laws are not long and drawn out like some of the other laws we live by. There's just a few and their pretty simple.

The circle is a metaphor for one of them, it is commonly mentioned in many of our traditional religions. So, how does that relate to you? One way is in the relationships you have in your life. Every single person you meet and involve yourself with during your life is there for a reason. The reason is that they help you change your perspective. They help you grow, willingly or unwillingly. They say things to you, they do things to you, they make you feel. But, you also do the same thing to them. Each and every one of them. The circle comes in how we relate with each of them. Sometimes we don't and the circle becomes a lose thread we eventually lose. Sometimes we do and the circle spreads itself way out over many years. We bring it full circle when we come to the realization we are only here to learn. Relationships teach us about ourselves. We've gotten caught up in the act of reacting to specific stimulus, drawing our conclusions in life from that which exists outside of us. Rather than drawing on that which is within, and being the stimulus for our own lives. The reason being is we don't truly understand the nature of relationships. A lot of our involvement's are out of convenience, for comfort, validation, security. We seek people who will make us feel these things without conflict. We know conflict makes us grow, but at the expense of our comfort. So much around us makes us uncomfortable, we think that experience is outside of us. When it is actually within.

We have focused life on the relationships outside of us, rather than having one within us. This is to be expected. That's why we have special people come into our lives and show us what lies within. The circle is joined when we acknowledge this dynamic. Rather than think a certain person makes us feel a certain way. We see that a certain person shows us that specific certain thing about ourselves. This dynamic become very difficult when it is a so called love relationship. We are finally comfortable enough to let our walls down. Then we begin to realize all the fears we have clung to, if we are lucky we recognize them as our own. If not, love eventually turns to fear, resentment, jealousy, and hate. Someone we presume to have loved, now becomes a lose thread in our past. We are left confused about what we thought we wanted. We were looking externally for something that can only exist internally.

Reconciliation now becomes the metaphor for the circle. We find the courage to reopen a dialogue, we hear their side of the story, we put aside our fears, we realize this person was only there to help us, we are grateful, we realize the special gift they have labored to give us merely by playing themselves, and that our own fears are to blame for the pain we suffered. What? You think people are inherently bad? That they seek to hurt us because they don't care. Here's a reality check. The way we have been taught to seek relationships in this society is, we seek ownership of every soul we encounter. If it happens to allow us to let down our walls, we feel dramatically vulnerable, that soul we seek to control most assertively. We track that soul wherever it goes, we want to know what its doing at all times. We seek to contractually bind it to us, so no other soul may ever experience it. We lock it up and dare it to hurt us. And if it does we lash out at it violently. We heap all manner of abuses upon it in the name of the freedom it has shown us within ourselves. Nice reward for such a special gift. In case you didn't notice, this behavior is DYSFUNCTIONAL. I repeat, it is DYSFUNCTIONAL. Every soul walking this planet is sovereign unto itself. It owes no allegiance to any government, religion, law, corporation, or conscious entity outside of itself. This includes you. The reason we have such a violent social and emotional environment in our society today, is we have left too many lose strings. We have not honored the circle of reconciliation. We have not allowed other souls to part from us free of malice. What comes around goes around, and keeps going until we come full circle and resolve it, within us.

We can choose not to. In which case, the fears we don't resolve in this lifetime become the subject matter of the next. The Universe is very consistent in its adherence to this dynamic. It is one of the most important. Thru it we evolve! You will not be in this reality and not evolve. Your lessons will only become harder, until you think they will literally kill you. And they will, physically, if need be. Your spirit, however, is infinite, it will never die. It will eventually learn and grow. What we experience as ourselves, ego, sometimes refuses to grow. Instead, it insists on dominating spirit, for the sake of survival. It is ego that causes us to seek to enslave other souls to us for comfort. Because ego cannot perceive the nature of spirit. It believes it is alone. It is not. In courage, spirit grows to define itself separate from ego. Until eventually ego lets go, the spirit is freed from its imprisonment by fear, and something very special happens. This is the process of relationships. They come and they go. We must learn to let someone go as freely as we let them come. To be blessed by their presence, as well as their absence. To learn to love in more than one way. Because in essence, we are learning to experience ourselves in more than one dimension. We can love in more than one way. When we can allow many souls to make us comfortable enough to let our walls down, we participate in a very special dynamic indeed! The angels will do more than sings.

That is only the beginning of an even larger circle. Reconciliation allows us to understand how the other person felt in relation to how we felt. It allows us to say we're sorry. Reconciliation allows us to recognize that fear within ourselves we needed to see, and understand it. Open communication is the key to reconciliation, it dispells the fear of illusion. Forgiveness allows us to release bad energy, rather than dragging it with us into our next lifetime, after it destroys us from within during this one. There will be other lessons. One lesson at a time. One fear at a time. Life is an experience you keep on living. You are foolish to think you can achieve a place of perfect comfort outside of yourself. That place only resides within. Seek every face with purpose and respect. Learn to complete the circle, and that simple image will open doors of understanding the likes of which you can't even imagine. Come in peace, go in Peace. And your way will be peaceful. Shalom.